I Wants This!: Pride and Prejudice and Zombies

So, right now, I’m reading, like, six books at once. I blame Mercury being in Retrograde for the majority of January and now the full moon, and the fact that my attention span has been rivalling that of Hiro Nakamura in a House of Waffles (sorry, latent Heroes reference. I will try to refrain). Those six books are:
  • A Lady of Scandal by Nicole Byrd, which is an unashamed Regency romance involving twins named from Shakespeare (Cordelia and Ophelia), a ruffian named Ransom, his vicar cousin named Giles (GILES!) and how Ophelia manages to be an actress when she’s a lady of ‘quality.’ Pure trash.
  • The Firm by John Grisham. This is at least the third if not fourth time I’ve read this. I mean, I can’t bring A Lady of Scandal to read on my lunch break at work; if I was teased about reading The Masque of the Black Tulip, which is about spies? A paperback with flowery print covering a woman gettinig out of a carraige with her ankles exposed will send The Boys into fits of lolz.
  • Fluke; or, I Know Why the Winged Whale Sings by Christopher Moore. Another book I’m reading at work, because dudes, I’ve read The Firm how many times?
  • Stranger by Megan Hart, which is Mid-Western Philosophy about a funeral director who, in order to escape intimacy, pays strangers to … discuss important topics such as truth and beauty. But when she picks up an actual stranger in a bar, her world turns upside-down (as it tends to do).
  • The Sex Lives of Cannibals by J. Maarten Troost. Maarten leaves his boring Washington DC world behind to travel with his girlfriend to an unknown island in the South Pacific. This is his story.
  • Finally, The Laughing Corpse by Laurell K. Hamilton, the second book in her Anita Blake, Vampire Hunter stories. I’m reading this for a few reasons: 1), because it follows Guilty Pleasures which I read last year; 2), I’ve read it before (this is again, at least the third time), and after Tess, I wanted something easy and trashy; and 3), because it involved zombies.

I’m actually writing (I know!) a story involving zombies, so The Laughing Corpse started as research. But then, lovely Stacy informed me of the best new book ever:

Pride and Prejudice and Zombies.

Yes, my friends – someone has finally done the Awesome and put ZOMBIES in a classic JANE AUSTEN NOVEL.

If you don’t believe me, go here and watch a short interview with the editor from the small publishing house. Stacy heard about it on Saturday, I checked out amazon.com on Saturday night, and now I WANTS IT. I wants it like Gollum.

And think of the ramifications. Pride and Prejudice is pretty good as it stands now, but zombies can only make it THAT MUCH BETTER. Pretty soon, all the cool kids will be doing it – and by ‘it,’ I mean inserting supernatural ideas into classic literature. After all, it is a truth universally acknowledged, that a classic novel taught in schools of good name, must be in need of some zombies.

And then, there are the film adaptations! As much as I don’t really like Kiera Knightley (a.k.a. Skeletor) and her version of P&P, I would pay to go see her running around Meryton with a shotgun and a machete. Lydia doesn’t run away with Wickham, she gets kidnapped by zombies! (I’m assuming – I have not read the book yet). Colin Firth, emerging from the lake, protecting Jennifer Ehle against a zombie uprising at Pemberley! Oh my … I WANTS IT.

According to the film clip, the book is slated for publication on April 1. BUY THIS BOOK. FOR REALS. Because I think it’s going to be awesome! And if everyone I know goes out and buys a copy on Publication Day, and if everyone I know tells everyone they know, you know what will happen? Pride and Prejudice and Zombies will become the new Twilight, and the earthly balance will be restored.

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